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Sunday, May 1

A DIARY


01.03.11 Excerpts

Fresh start. This was a common phrase we usually hear on New Year’s Day. Indeed it was a fresh start for most of us, but not all of us. Everyone wanted to change things in their lives hoping to make it better. I confess to be one of them, although this year, what happened was much more of a same old brand new rather than a fresh start. Nothing is new except for one thing, I found myself scribbling on the keyboard squeezing out my literary juices to come up with something. Hmm… I hope I can do this more often. And what keeps me motivated? I was in a jeepney with several high school students on my way home few minutes ago. It was nice reminiscing the past seeing those young people talk about their school stuffs; but I felt a little pain. I regret those times that I haven’t took advantage of my youth. I could have done better. So I started this to remind me of my past and guide me the where I am going.

It was really hard to start a new one because life is difficult and unfair, that’s your reason if you are one of those dumb lazy people where I happened to be. Sad but true. No matter how eager you are to start if you are scared of what you may encounter in the long run, you will certainly not succeed. It is as if walking in a dark room, you cannot see anything but you just have to push through. Overcome your fear or be devoured by it. As long as you know where you are heading to, with pure faith and strength you will surely be victorious. Well, easy for me to say yet I still cannot do it.

The past year was one of those hard times where I am struggling to achieve my goals. And the ending? Several breakthroughs but overall DEFEATED. It may sound too dramatic but life is dramatic. Everyone has its own story. Ending might be similar but the ways and process to attain it differs. I know this wouldn’t be an easy battle. I just wish writing this would ignite what I have inside to bring all my aspirations and dreams to reality. I hope I can win this time.


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